Attachment: The missing link for effective leadership

Effective relationship management is a hallmark of exceptional leadership.
Build stronger teams, optimize communication, promote strong employee retention and success!

Attachment style coaching is helpful for managers, CEO`s and executives and other leaders in many ways. Here are a few examples of the many benefits Attachment Style Coaching can have for you and your Company.

  • Understand your own attachment style (old patterns/limiting beliefs) and recognize how it influences your leadership style.
  • Empathy and emotional intelligence: Develop your ability to understand and respond to the emotions of others to foster trust and connection.
  • Lower turnover and higher employee retention: Employees feel valued, are more engaged as a result, identify more with the company, are less likely to take sick leave, and commit to the company long-term, resulting in low turnover and higher retention of top talent.
  • Improved collaboration and productivity: Teams work together more effectively, resulting in higher productivity and better project completion.
  • Develop more effective communication and conflict resolution skills.
  • Create a positive and supportive work environment for employees.
  • Build stronger relationships with team members.

There are a number of different approaches to attachment style coaching. I use a combination of the psychodynamic approach and the behavioral approach. The psychodynamic approach is about approaching unconscious processes and mechanisms, i.e. bringing them into consciousness in order to change them. This also includes the so-called “limiting beliefs”, such as “I AM NOT GOOD ENOUGH”, which in turn leads to perfectionism, procrastination, constant fighting, resentment, resignation, rejection of oneself and others, etc.

These unconscious processes are based on old patterns and childhood injuries and remain active until we become aware of them and change them.

The goal of attachment style coaching is to help leaders become aware of their own attachment style/relationship/behavioural patterns and recognize how these influence their relationships with others, both in professional and private life.

By understanding these patterns, you can develop new behaviors and strategies that enable you to be more effective in your leadership role.

Examples of how attachment style coaching can be used to improve leadership skills:

A leader with an anxious attachment style is more likely to control their employees and interfere too much in their work. If this manager understands their attachment style, they can learn to delegate tasks more effectively and give their employees more autonomy, which contributes to greater satisfaction for everyone involved and is therefore also reflected in the efficiency of the work performed.

A manager with an avoidant attachment style tends to give their employees too much freedom and not provide them with sufficient guidance or support. By understanding their attachment style, this leader can learn to be more present and engaged with their team members and give them the support they need to succeed.

A leader with a mixed attachment style is inconsistent in their leadership style. One day they can be supportive and encouraging, but the next day they can be strict and critical. By understanding their attachment style, this leader can learn to be more consistent and provide a more predictable and supportive work environment for their employees.

Attachment style coaching is a valuable tool for managers and leaders who want to improve their relationships with their employees and create a more positive and productive work environment. By understanding their own attachment style and its impact on their leadership style, leaders can develop new behaviors and strategies that enable them to be more effective in their role.

Leaders with a secure attachment style are more successful, especially in the long term, because they are able to build strong, trusting relationships with their teams. They are also more likely to be able to support and strengthen their team and are better able to manage conflict.

Managers with insecure attachment styles, on the other hand, find it difficult to build strong, trusting relationships with their teams. They also tend to be more controlling and micromanaging and often have difficulty delegating tasks.

Attachment style coaching can help leaders understand their own attachment styles and recognize how these influence their leadership behavior. It can also help them to develop a more secure attachment style, leading to more effective leadership.

Less conflict, less employee turnover, less sickness absence:

Leaders who are able to manage conflict effectively, or prevent it from arising in the first place, have a more stable, happier and therefore more productive team.

Better decision making and problem solving:

When leaders are more aware of their own emotions, they are better able to make sound decisions and solve problems effectively.

If you are a leader interested in improving your leadership skills, I would encourage you to consider attachment style coaching. It is a very effective tool for developing more effective relationships with your team and leading more successfully.

Mirjam Barner is a certified Strategic Intervention Coach (Robbins-Madanes Training) Tony Robbins, Cloe Madanes & Attachment Style Expert.